Monthly Archives: October 2015

Die Dog or Eat the Hatchet by Adam Howe

Die Dog or Eat the Hatchet by Adam Howe

This book is a collection on 3 novellas.
First up you have
Damn Dirty Apes

Reggie used to be a prizefighter before he went up against Boar Hog Brannon.
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He got his butt kicked and is now serving as a bouncer at the Henhouse.
The Henhouse was a titty honk on the outskirts of town. The joint wasn’t much to write home about, and why the hell would you? Dear Mom, Getting a lap dance and thought of you…. Lit by neon beer signs, fairy lights, and a gaudy glitter ball about the T-shaped stage, the place had a seedy Pleasure Island ambience.
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One of the local idiotspatrons decides to make a monster porn starring his stripper girlfriend and his best friend (who just happens to dress in his old mascot outfit-large ape)
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During amateur porn time..the legendary Bigelow Skunk Ape takes a liking to his buddy, Ned and takes off with him.
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So it’s up to Reggie, the videographer Lester, his stripper/pornstarwannabe girlfriend and a Monster hunter to head off into the woods to try and “rescue” Ned.
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Die Dog or Eat the Hatchet

Terrence Hingle is in the looney bin for chopping up some sorority girls. He escapes and takes with him a waitress from the near by dive because she drives a volkswagon Bug.
“Ted Bundy drove a Bug.” The man grinned. “Did you know that?”
No. No, she hadn’t known that. What person in their right mind would?

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On the escape they meet up with a couple of really sweet brothers.
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And stuff happens.
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Gator Bait I had already read this one..but it’s freaking awesome.
Poor Smitty aka Three Fingers. He gets caught with his hand in the honey pot.
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By the Honey Pot’s husband and ends up losing a couple of the fingers on his hand. It could have been worse since there was a “cigar cutter” involved.
He takes off running.
Smitty ends up in the swamp at a bar named “The Grinnin’ Gator”.
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Smitty needs some cash and a place to re-adjust so he takes a job playing the piano at the bar.
But this bar has a story, Croker who owns the bar has a little something extra out back.
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Big George.

Big George was captured by Croker on a gator hunt he took with his dad..Croker’s leg didn’t make it. Daddy might be scarce too.
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But poor Big George ended up getting hunted and brought back to the Grinnin’ Gator. He is Croker’s bestie though and he makes sure that he gets lots of goodies.
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Now there is the sad little fact that Smitty has sworn off the Dames after losing his fingers over one…but then enters Grace.
She just happens to be Croker’s wife.

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Then the shit hits the fan.
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Booksource: The author of this book did provide me with an ARC copy of this book. He knew what he was getting into…

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Blue Hill Blood by Elizabeth Gray

Blue Hill Blood by Elizabeth Gray

The book opens with a look at Henry’s past. It’s ugly and it even made my old hateful self have a few feels. He ended up being raised by his grandmother after losing his sister Helen and both parents. Henry goes through hell, I’m not spoiling anything by telling you that part.

Then you meet present day Henry, he has moved on from the horrible tragedy and is now happily married, has two children and is a very successful writer.

He writes a series based on a serial killer named Eli. His series is even in the talks of a movie deal.

This was reminiscent for me of Stephen King’s Misery and I remember wanting to read the books that King’s character was writing and I felt the same way about the books that Henry was putting out..I WANTS!

Henry is on a deadline though, he has his publisher chomping at the bit wanting that next Eli book yesterday. Henry has hit a small writer’s block though.
His wife and he agree that he needs to get away and he decides on the small town of Blue Hill.
On his way to the town he meets up with the sheriff’s daughter who could pass for a twin of his dead sister Helen.
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Now I was very entranced with the story..thought I would be able to figure things out on the way it was going.
Then:
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I was so very, very wrong.

If you read this book…and I hope you will..DO NOT RAGE Quit!! Don’t do it. Just keep reading.
Because……
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There is a passage between two of the character’s that stuck out in this book for me.
“Wow, movie man. You write scary stuff? Like Stephen King?” she questions, this time resting her elbows on the bar in front of me, giving me prime view of her saggy tits.
“Something like that but more like James Patterson.”

This kicks James Patterson’s ass so hard that he won’t find it in the middle of next week.
It’s that good.

GO READ THIS BOOK! and then…join me
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Booksource: I was gifted this copy by an awesome reviewer.

Black Earth: The Holocaust as History and Warning by Timothy Snyder

Black Earth by Timothy Snyder

I picked this book because in the sixth grade I had one of the most amazing teacher that I can remember. She spent 9 weeks teaching us the history of the Holocaust. My son is in the sixth grade so I thought I would brush up with the history of that tragedy with this book.
This book is almost over my head. It did not work for what I had intended it for.
But does that mean it’s a bad book? Of course not.

Snyder gives a detailed. (Sometimes almost mind numbingly so) recounting of Hitler’s maniacal rise and then he makes you stop and think…Could something similar happen now?

Don’t shake your head no so fast, buster.
He uses other for instances but it’s my little review space and I tend to ramble so I’m using one that I know of recently..
My state Six Flags featured a day for each of several religions. I know that they had “Christian Day” and several other “special days” featured. Then they had “Muslim Day”. People flipped their lids. Social media blew up with hate and ramblings and honestly? If I had been Muslim there is no way in heck that I would attend that event that day. Because what was being posted scared me.
Hate festers and spreads.

Then Snyder talks about world climate and how if food sources were in short supply, what would happen? Would people turn against a group of people with the whole survival of the fittest in mind?

Most of the reviews on Goodreads and everywhere else I looked have this book as a highly rated book. And it’s good. But, to me the author talks over most people’s head on a subject that needs to be talked about and remembered. I just wish that it had been a tad bit more understandable.

Booksource: Blogging for books in exchange for review.

The Little Brother by Victoria Patterson

The Little Brother by Victoria Patterson

WHY ARE MORE PEOPLE NOT READING THIS BOOK???!!!! Go get it now. It deserves the hype and so much more.

Even Hyde is the little brother. He loses part of his connection with his older brother Gabe when his parents divorce and Even goes to live with his dad. Gabe stays with their emotionally unstable mom.

Dad is super rich and very much in control. He has connections with the police and the boys know that they have a “get out of jail free” card when they mention their father’s name.
(These boys characters come to life in this book. I wanted to just snatch up Even and let him live with us to get him away from the whole mess and Gabe? I wanted to stomp a mudhole in his ass.)

Gabe starts hanging out more at his dad’s house. Because that’s where the money is and there is very little supervision.
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Gabe had received a video camera from his dad for a birthday and he uses it to make skateboarding videos of himself and his friends. But that’s not the only thing that Gabe is interested in making films of.
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Because on the few days surrounding the fourth of July these boys lives will change forever.

Gabe and his friends commit a horrible crime. The video tape they make of them committing the crime ends up in Even’s hands. Does he go against his family and turn it in? Or do as he thinks his powerful dad would do and just destroy it?
Living and breathing and existing as a part of this crazy world, not understanding what anything meant. Trying to make sense, struggling. It felt as if I could shatter, and that then I’d be nothing.

This book puts you through every emotion known to man. You feel for Even as he struggles with guilt and that gut turning rage that I felt for what his brother did.
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It makes you question yourself…
People love to be indignant. “If it had been me,” they like to say, if they suspect that an acquaintance or family member might be a rapist, molester, drug dealer, thief, et cetera, I would’ve turned him or her in right away.”
But they don’t know what it’s like. Or they’re lying. It’s far more comfortable and easy to remain stupid and silent. Like I would have.

This author gives you a glimpse of what it’s like. And it’s one of the most emotionally tormenting books that I’ve read. Could you turn in a family member? Think hard before you answer that question.

There is rape in this book for all of you that can’t deal with that trigger and it’s pretty graphic. But it’s needed for this story..in which you see the guilt of the brother who believes himself as a Judas, traitor, jackass, rat, backstabber, double-crosser, tattletale, squealer, snitch.
It’s needed to see how this poor girl is turned on by the very friends that she relied on to help her. Sixteen year old girls can be just as much the devil as the boys can.
It’s needed to see how someone can be “tried in the court of public opinion.”
It’s needed to see how money can influence the law and the court system.
You will rage.

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So go read this book and decide for yourselves..it’s not always so easy.

Booksource: I did receive a copy of this book from the author. She did not ask for a review. I’m furnishing that because I want too. With an overall average rating of the books I’ve read at 3.15 stars..it’s pretty safe to say that I’m not influenced by that in the least. These are my true feelings for this book.

Food by Jim Gaffigan

Food by Jim Gaffigan

I think I found my long lost brother…
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Yes Jim..I do.

A book on totally embracing all your food sins? Sign me up. I try and eat healthy..Avoid McDonald’s, Not eat Bacon for everymeal (Notice how Bacon gets capitilized-it should always), eat some veggies..and fruit.
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Who am I kidding? In this book you don’t read it for the fruit! You read it to have fun with food. Even when it kills you.
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Jim Gaffigan doesn’t care if you eat McDonald’s. He admits he does. Even when he hides behind the counters so that you can’t see him there.
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I think he might be a chubby evil genius though. He comes up with the idea of restaurants helping you when you go out to eat. Instead of wine sommeliers the joints should have “fattelier”
Case in point:
Fattelier: Well, I’d get the chili cheese fries with the cheese on the side. You get more cheese that way.

Genius.

Now is Gaffigan a foodie? Heck no. He is an “eatie” I think I’m going to give up being a foodie and just join his idea. It sounds like way more fun. Plus, I’m kinda lazy too. So win win.
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Now I do know that Gaffigan gained some fame from his routine with “Hot Pockets” and there is mention of them in this book. But that part was the most boring thing in the book so I admit to skimming there. I’m not even brave enough to eat those suckers. So ain’t nobody got time for that.
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He also is not a big fan of sea-bugs seafood so if you love the stuff just get prepared to maybe not love it so much after reading this book.
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The book is fun though. He takes you to some of his favorite burger places, places to get BBQ, talks about grits in the south, describes the eating experiences of American holidays…I loved it.

So just embrace your eating. At least as long as it takes to power through this book. Because you gonna be hungry. Not for kale either.
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Booksource: I received a copy of this book from blogging for books in exchange for review.